How Baby Blogs Die

Wow. So I went on a bike ride one Tuesday instead of updating and here we are, 2 months later with no posts. I did notice a while back that various parenting blogs on the net usually do seem to die out around this point in the kid's life.

And now I think I'm starting to understand why.

Reason 1: Kid changes

Also, the kid and me were a bit
sick for a week or so...

Cleo has gotten a lot more mobile. She does her bear walk crawl everywhere, hoists herself up in to standing position, and has been experimenting with what she can do as a biped. It won't be long now until she's officially a toddler. Oddly, this is LESS exhausting than it was before. Her independence means she doesn't constantly have to be entertained and that she doesn't get frustrated when she gets into odd positions.

What it does requires, though, is more attention. Every few minutes a glance at the kiddo is required just to make sure she isn't trying to eat a paperclip that fell off the table or that she hasn't gotten hold of something easily destroyed. For example, the other day, she put the iMote for our Apple TV into a half full bottle of water. She was very proud of herself and VERY frustrated when dad didn't appreciate this and was rushing around trying to find rice and a ziplock bag in order to have half a hope of salvaging the device. (Note: The iMote did dry off and is working.)

This means less large blocks of time where I can sit down and focus and more small blocks of time. It's tough to adapt to. Add in:

Reason 2: Life Changes

The stable situation of me having every Tuesday off is in the past. For the last 2 months I have, more often than not, had to work Tuesday. Things like Cleo's upcoming birthday, Thanksgiving, X-Mas, etc, mean I have to ration out my leave time. That means less 3 day spans of time for dad and kiddo. Truthfully, Cleo is much lower maintenance now than she was 6 months ago and doesn't require constant parental attention. When left with her grandmother for less than 4 hours at a time, I doubt she even really realizes we've gone!

Still, this means, once again, less solid blocks of time for dad where I would normally have the time to leisurely access my muse. Leading to:

Reason 3: Dad has to Change!

A friend of mine with kids once told me that the moment you get things figured out, it all changes. Now I'm starting to understand HOW this happens. My life has changed from one of exhausting but dependable daily slogs to a fragmented existence. Learning how to write during these fragments is HARD!

For example, I recently learned that after our morning shower, I have about 20-30 minutes to write. She has been entertained in the morning, fed, changed, cleaned, and is now relaxed and able to relax and play by herself during this time. I have to pull up a zafu to a stepstool in her room and write right then! No checking e-mail or reddit, start right in! NOW! DO IT!

(Repeat for whatever other fragments of time I'm able to identify during the day.)

Anyhow, if I had to say why some of those blogs die off, it's probably this challenge to change your habits that causes things to stall. Doing this is wildly uncomfortable and takes practice, but, as I hope this blog post proves, I'm at least STARTING to get better at it.  I really want to keep this blog going, though, so I hopefully I keep adapting!

Delayed

Hiya all. I was going to work on my post today, but H got the afternoon off! We rode bikes with Cleo and went and saw a movie. I'll try to get the post up tomorrow!

Talkin Bout my Chariot

So a while back, H asked me about bike trailers. This is what I sent her:

So I did some research on bike trailers. The Burley trailers are considered fine for light use. Once Cleo is old enough to go in a trailer, though, I'm thinking the bike will be my primary mode of transport with her. So I'm not looking for a Sunday bike ride trailer, I'm looking for a car substitute.

Enter... The Chariot.

Has storage space in back. All weather. Shocks and a hammock style seat for child comfort. Converts quickly and easily to a stroller and back for outings and shopping. Should be able to haul her around for a few years in it until she's old enough for a tag-along. She and I will fear no rain in it. Expensive, but this will free us up from having to depend on the car!

I was expecting to get it for my birthday in the fall, but H was able to get it on sale recently to allow us to enjoy the summer!

Don't get me wrong, the Yepp is still preferred for sunny bike rides, but our Chariot isn't about that. It allows dad to capture a bit of his former life when I lived primarily by bike. There have been many times in the last 9 months where I have been immensely frustrated with having to pack up the kid into the car for minor trips out.

Non-approved baby positioning

Now, that's a thing of the past.

We tried it out a few times on fun rides and set things up so H's bike hitches up to it as well. For me, though, the real test came last week.

You see, Cleo sometimes enjoys hummus on pita in the mornings. One day a few weeks ago, I gave her some hummus for breakfast that I had bought at our local store. Then, as is our tradition, I took the slimy post-breakfast baby upstairs for a shower.

While getting cleaned up, though, her skin became super red on her face and chest, causing a dad freakout!

A superposition of two states

I called the advice nurse but, thankfully, the kid wasn't troubled and was mostly bewildered as to why her shower was cut short. The blotches were actually fading even as I waited. The nurse first reassured me it was not the dreaded allergic reaction. She told me that different types of hummus have different concentrations of lemon juice and other irritants in them and that, combined with hot water and soap, irritated Cleo's skin significantly.

Fast forward to last week. Cleo is out of hummus for tomorrow and I now only trust Trader Joe's Organinc Hummus. It's raining outside. I could pack her in the car... but all we really need is hummus. My eyes turn to the Chariot.

Let's do this!

Wave function collapsed...
And the kid is nice and dry

I'm leaning that the biggest downside of a baby trailer is the fact that you have no idea what's going on in there. On a sunny day you can leave it open enough to look back and see how the kid is doing. When you close the rain flap? Cleo suddenly turns into Schrodinger's cat. The only thing keeping me from hopping off of my bike at every intersection to check on her is Cleo's humming or occasional laugh.

Actually, one time I did hop off because I hadn't heard her make any noise for a time and it was raining a bit fierce. Cleo was happy as a clam and looked up at me with this casual "Oh, hi there!" expression on her face.

Anyhow, the trip went well, the baby stayed dry, and we got a few things more than hummus, all fitting in the Chariot easily. Successful trip? BIG YES!

In fact, the only real problem I have with the Chariot is that I get that Phineas and Ferb song stuck in my head every single time I load the thing up; often I end up singing it to Cleo. Enjoy.

Morning People

Cleo likes to sleep in. For a while, I honestly believed this was a good thing. I LOVE to sleep in and I was feeling pretty blessed that my progeny shared in this. On my days off, the kid and I would blurrily blink ourselves awake around 10 or so and officially start our day around 11.

My view during down dog...

Slowly, though, we realized that this carried with it a frightful consequence: Late night baby. H and I struggled for some time with a little girl that would not sleep at night without making the connection. I mean, it seems obvious, but for a long time we missed it that if she is sleeping in until 10, why wouldn't she be up until 1or 2 am that night?

Sadly for dad, once we did make the connection, we had to end the sleep-ins. Alarms were set for 8 am with a special sleep in time of 8:30 am. The kid's been pretty unaffected by getting up earlier and actually does seem to thrive. Dad, on the other hand, has to sigh and, while entertaining the fantasy of building a pillow barricade around the kid to prevent her from toppling over the edge while I sneak in an extra hour of sleep, force himself to get up.

I've combated this by creating a routine. For about 1/2 an hour after waking, the kid climbs and rolls around on the "dad-nasium" and generally has a good time while dad tries to secretly check his email on his phone without the kid becoming interested in stealing the phone from dad. We then go to Cleo's room where she's free to crawl around, make noise, bang on stuff, do her feral growling (I feel at times like my child is part velociraptor...) and generally just entertain herself while dad does some yoga, which includes her rolling under dad and laughing while he is in Down Dog.

Then it's down to the dining room for breakfast for the kid with coffee for dad. After that, upstairs for a shower to clean up the thick coat of food the child has smeared on herself. Then it's back down to the main room where the kid is placed in the Pack and Play so dad can clean up the carnage from an enthusiastic baby breakfast. After that, it's milk time, then nap.

This usually takes us to around noon. I have to say, I've become a big fan of this routine. I'm not sure how Cleo feels about it as her mother is a lot less rigid than I am and their days together are much more free form. For the most part, though, Cleo does seems to do well with this.

What has suffered, though, is our ability to make events. For example, a brief look at PDX Kids Calendar from last Wednesday shows 16 kids events occurring in the morning between 9 am and 11, with only 6 happening in the afternoon... really only 4 if you don't count mommy matinees.


This puts me in a conundrum. Do I keep to the morning routine I've grown to love and that really helps bring peace of mind to me and reliable structure for Cleo? Or do I pack us up without our morning ritual in order to make sure my little girl continues to have a variety of experiences (even if she doesn't really comprehend most of them...)?

Yes, I know the answer is compromise, but I just hate having to break away from something that is working well. I'm hopeful that the new bike trailer (more on that in my next update!) will help with me feeling a bit more enthusiastic about getting the kid out and about in the AM. I'll keep you posted!

Independent yoga time

Bike Solo

So I had a great thing lined up for my blog post. H, Cleo, H's mom, and I met a friend and her family at an outdoor showing of the Princess Bride at one of the parks in Portland.

Sounds pretty cool, huh?

Unfortunately, no matter how cool the event is, if I forget to take pictures it makes for a dull blog post. In our defense, it got dark really quick, you can't exactly take pictures during the movie, and H and I spent most of the movie walking around in the back of the park trying to calm a fussy Cleo.

Luckily, Cleo and I did a few things that week, one of which is that she and I took our first bike trip out in the community without H as my wing(wo)man. Let me first convey how terrifying this is. I had never loaded up Cleo on my bike without help, had never carried a backpack stuffed to the brim with picnic stuff while doing this, and I was still unsure how well Cleo likes the bike, though signs were good so far.

I'm also super paranoid with Cleo on the front. I trust no one. I glare at people in cars as if they are secretly plotting against us. This, understandably, makes for a tense bike ride.


It was a beautiful day, though, and I couldn't let my neurotic tendencies stand in the way of a fun outing.

So we loaded up and headed out. Cleo giggled the whole way and made funny sounds and we got there without incident.

Another good thing is that you can count on Portland to be entertaining. We got there and there was some sort of... cajun band I suppose?.. that were practicing. Then some lady pulls up on a bike near us and just sets up a hammock between two trees... but it wasn't a normal net hammock. It was nylon or something and she didn't so much as recline into it as she disapeared into it. Like it... enveloped her... cattepillar style while she read her book. It did not look comfortable. Then after the cajun band finished, a lady with a snare drum and an eyepatch showed up and met a friend with a ukulele and they practiced songs.

I think she's ready to go home...

This is the type of stuff that Cleo will grow up thinking is normal. Which is kind of odd yet cool.

On the way back, I faced a new dilemma: sleepy kid. Sure, we got a lot of "OMG! She's passed out! How cute!" comments, but since I was dealing with the logistics, of this, I didn't get to enjoy it much. You see, in the Yepp, the kid kind of slumps forward and will wobble around like well cooked asparagus unless supported. Sure, you can buy some Ikea type pillow for it called the Schlep or something, but it's $40 and we haven't encountered this problem enough to rationalize that. So for now it's kind of an elbows-in biking style I use where I support her head with my elbows while holding onto the handlebars.

Still, we got home, kid transitioned to the swing and finished her nap no problem, and I got that feeling of accomplishment I get when I've done something just a little bit daring for her.

Finally, Movies!

So I said I wasn't going to do any more mommy matinee posts for Tuesdays with Cleo, but I can't really pass up talking about the recent ones I've seen.

Due to the kiddo, I feel like I'm living in a distant country where movies get released much later for me. All of these "summer blockbusters" have been out since early summer, but I see them anywhere from 2-3 months after they've been released when they come to Mommy Matinee. So it's only been recently that I've FINALLY gotten to see the movies I've been wanting to see since about May. And it's been really, really interesting to contrast and compare.

Let me first state that Cleo and I have this mommy matinee thing down. We get there early and get situated. I pack solids (berries, apple slices, etc) for her to eat during the previews and order my food. She watches the screen a bit and plays for about the first half hour, then gets fussy. Then I heat up some milk, put her in the Ergo, strap the Ergo on, and pace around in the back of the theater and bottle feed her for a while. After about a half hour of this, she's passed out and I return to my seat to watch the last hour or so of the movie while she naps. I'm actually really surprised at how well this has worked, and I miss out on very little of the movie!

So the most recent one we saw was the Superman reboot "The Man of Steel", but I think I need to explain the other movies we've seen in recent weeks to get my impression of it, so we'll start with "Iron Man 3".

I saw it a few weeks ago and it was definitely a "comic book movie". There are elements of the ridiculous meshed in with the action and despite some tense scenes the end game is "fun". I guess it pissed off some fans due to how they portrayed The Mandarin, but I thought it was nice since they were already handling the Extremis story line. As we saw in "Spider Man 3", cramming in too many iconic bad guys actually leads to less fulfillment.

Next was "Star Trek: Into Darkness". This was really, really fun to the point that you don't even really notice the gigantic plot holes. As a reboot, it also includes a lot of "wink and a nod" moments for true fans, such as Bones saying his "Damnit Jim! I'm a doctor not a (insert occupation here)." It has some complex messages, but it doesn't beat you over the head with them.

Now we get to "Man of Steel". I was really excited about this one, to the point that I dressed up Cleo in Supergirl gear. However, it was kind of flat. I can see what they were trying to do. It's as if the were picturing a universe where comic books don't exist and what a Superman movie would be if it were just straight up Sci-Fi about an alien refugee raised on Earth. With lots of wanton destruction.

By getting rid of the fun, comic book element of Iron Man and the "wink and a nod" element of a reboot like Star Trek, it felt unrecognizable. This wasn't really a "Superman" movie. He doesn't stop bank robberies, save people from muggings, or catch people falling off of buildings. He came in and beat the crap out of a bunch of other Kryptonians. Maybe this guy on screen will be Superman someday, but right now, he's not. I can't fault their desire to be original, but it ended up feeling tedious.

Anyhow, here's a much more entertaining video of Cleo playing in her Jumparoo in her Supergirl cape.

Boldly Go

So this last week was the final week of my mom's visit which has been very bittersweet for me. I hate to see her go, but it's been nice having her around to hang out with Cleo, to see the two of them bond, and for me to enjoy the air conditioning in the RV! I feel confident saying the visit was a success and we're all looking forward to a much longer visit next summer!

To take some of the gloom out of her leaving, we decided to end on a high note by seeing Trek in the Park, which was Cleo's first and, sadly, last experience with this as this is the last year of the event. I'm pretty bummed about it, but I understand. Atomic Arts started it five years ago as a quirky event, it then grew to be a "Portland Thing" complete with a parody of it on Portlandia, and now it's become an institution. My step-father phrased it best when he pointed out that voluntarily pouring your time and effort into a project you are passionate about is one thing, being obligated to do it is an entirely different experience.

Since I worked that morning, I had to relinquish organizational control of the gathering to entirely to H, which was really hard for me. We're talking my mom, step-dad, two dogs, a baby, H, H's mom, and me showing up later. You have to get there 3-4 hours early, so she would need to bring food for all of us, the dogs, and the kiddo. Plus it's Portland so you have to prepare for both sun AND rain.

With the exception of H's mom who wasn't able to make it due to some bad luck, H pulled things together and it went off really, really well. Atomic Arts did "The Trouble with Tribbles" this year and it has felt like half of Portland has been making tribbles for the past few months to help them with this. The production was fun and the guy who plays Scotty stole the show (just as James Doohan does in the original broadcast) and to my personal delight they included the part where Kirk continues to get pelted by tribbles as he is stranded under a pile of them.

My favorite part of the live version though? Not even on stage. It happened when, 10 minutes into the show, it started raining. The show didn't miss a beat and neither did the audience, and my step-dad said in surprise when looking at the crowd, "Wow! No one's even moving to get out of the rain!" Portland. As. Hell!

Most importantly, the parents liked it. Making people wait for four hours in the sun on a blanket with a baby and dogs and then having to watch a show in the rain sets the bar pretty high, but thankfully, I feel like it met the expectations! Thanks for the good times Atomic Arts! Live long and prosper!

Ain't no tribble at all!