Mommy Matinee 2: This is 40

I'm looking forward to the day that Tuesday will be bright and sunny and Cleo will be eager to head out. Until then, I have this:

I had planned to do something new like take advantage of the $4 baby day at the zoo, but sadly, it's a no go with weather like that. I'm anticipating we will be outside again soon, but until then, I'll be checking out the Mommy Matinees.

I party how I want to

This week we went to see "This is 40". Cleo slept the whole way there and woke up right when the movie started all ready to party! You know, as long as your definition of a party is screaming, crying, and eventually defecating on yourself. A friend of mine partied like that one night in college (albeit with the help of some hallucinogenic mushrooms) and while driving him home from Harborview Hospital the next day he informed me that it was not a pleasant experience, but that doesn't seem to deter my kid for some reason.

The place was a lot more packed than the last movie we went to and I also ended up sitting next to a group of moms who all knew each other. Initially it was just one who sat down, then she would excitedly wave at some lady who came into the theater who would then tromp over in an Ergo or wheel her stroller over until there were about four or five of them. Nothing wrong with this, just... kind of awkward... like having Patton Oswalt sitting at the same table as the ladies in Sex and the City.

The only time she slept?
The ticket line.

So was this movie funny? Parts of it were freaking hilarious! Unfortunately, the energy of the movie is just... vitriolic. The two main characters are angry and yelling at each other and/or their kids for about 2/3 of the movie. There's one point where the kids yell at each other to shut up, so the mom yells at them to shut up, and they yell back at her to shut up, so she yells louder at them to shut up and... it just feels like it goes on for freaking forever and makes you tense and wanting to yell at them to shut up!

As for how the babies handled this energy though... have you ever seen The Wave done in a stadium? Everyone standing up in succession, you can see it coming, you stand up and make noise when it's your turn, and then it goes on to the people next to you?

Picture that, except with crying babies.

Sooner or later, the Paul Rudd and Leslie Mann characters yelling at each other would cause... a cry in the theater. It would spill over to the next kid, then the next, cascading closer and closer to my little girl until, inevitably, she is set off. And let me tell you, that kid has a set of lungs on her! I think Cleo must have a competitive streak in her cause she would take whatever the kids around her were doing and crank it up a notch. You just get so used to your baby's cry that it just becomes a part of your life and I really had no idea that my daughter's volume goes up to 11 until then!

Unfortunately, once she was up, all of the angry sniping by Rudd and Mann in the movie kept her up. One of the "mom crew" moms next to me actually apologized to her boy for taking him to a movie with so much shouting. By the hour and forty five minute mark (of a two hour movie) the theater was full of wailing babies with parents (including me) walking around the theater comforting them, all of us unwilling to surrender and leave when the end was so close.

More Dos than Uno really...

The sad thing is that, while it was eclipsed by all the crying, I felt pretty vindicated as a journeyman dad there at one point. Cleo had a blowout early on with crap going halfway up her back, but I brought... THE BACKUP OUTFIT!  I get an almost transcendental amount of satisfaction from being prepared for stuff like this. You know how in UNO someone will change the color with their second to last card, but then you change it to something else right before it gets back to them and they sigh and have to draw a bunch of cards? That's what it feels like!

So anyhow, the ratings (1-10 scale):

Enjoyment - 6  Thought I was gonna give this a lower rating, huh? Well despite the toxic energy of the movie turning my daughter into a high needs baby it was freaking hilarious! Definitely felt a half hour too long though.

Comprehension - 8  A credit to the flat plot of the movie more than anything Cleo or I did to enhance this, but flat plot or no, I didn't ever feel lost. 

Baby Satisfaction - 2  Cleo did not like this movie and I can't say I blame her. Bad baby energy.